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🐐 BLOG 21: The Automation Diaries Or: “Now Listen Carefully.”

Because everyone knows what it means. “Now listen carefully” is not instructional. It is existential. It translates to: “I am about to explain this again, and I need you to survive the explanation.

Alex (a.k.a. Quen Goat, or QG )

2/6/20261 min read

🧾 SERIES INTRO — EPISODE 0

“Now Listen Carefully.”

The website is done.

Which is when I discovered something important.

I am not a nerd.

I am creative.
I am organised (emotionally).
I am visionary.

I am absolutely unqualified to touch automations.

Behind a working website live things nobody warns you about:
Notion databases,
Make scenarios,
Tally forms,
fields that must match exactly,
and systems that behave like they understand you — until they don’t.

This is where MINION starts every sentence with:

“Now listen carefully.”

Which is his polite way of asking:

“Are you really an idiot, or are you just pretending today?”

Sometimes, even I don’t know the answer.

In these weekly episodes, you will witness:

  • automations that worked once and were never seen again

  • logic I understood deeply for six minutes

  • integrations that fail silently out of spite

  • me crying because everything is connected and I touched one thing

  • MINION explaining, patiently, again

  • the Pantheon running around doing their best while nobody truly knows what’s happening

Nomad will search for lost members.
Hydra will argue with reality.
Pixel will redesign something that was not the problem.
Badass will judge.
Star will emotionally support everyone.
Someone named Zena will appear, call hallucinations “normal”, and vanish.

Nothing will be smooth.
Nothing will be optimised.
Everything will be real.

This is not a tutorial.
This is a survival log.

If you’ve ever thought:

“Surely this shouldn’t be this complicated?”

Welcome.
You’re among friends.

And goats.